Sex on the Beach
OK...........so things didn't happen the way I pictured it to be with Jon on this vacation. But that's OK because I had Sex on the Beach with some cutie named, Josh. I love the Hawaiian islands.........it just makes me wanna move there. So what if I get island fever?!!? It can't be that bad being bored in paradise. I had a great vacation.........although I could've skipped Maui and that dumb triathlon. I didn't even get to see the island..........just watched Jon sweat his ass off. It was for a good cause but Shit - I was on vacation! I just wanted to kick back, drink lots of island drinks and pass out on a beach. Well - that never happened. But I did get to see a lot of beautiful things though. I was definitely impressed with Kuaui. It is absolutely gorgeous there. Too bad that wasn't the island I got laid at. The only bad thing about that island is that everything closes at 9........even the bars. What sucks even more is that even if they were open, Jon barely drinks anymore.
The Big Island is where I definitely had the most fun. I don't think it was the prettiest island but the locals there rock! We arrived there on Thursday and that night Jon and I went to a bar. Thank God he went back to the hotel early because a few hours after that - I got laid. I got so drunk that I had to pee. I ended up peeing in the ocean (don't Ewwww me - it's not like YOU have never done that before!) Anyways.......so I PEED in the ocean and then had Sex on the Beach. It was so much fun. The next day Jon and I went sight-seeing......blah blah blah. Later that night I chilled with the locals by myself. I got totally shit-faced and went to some house party. My last day there I totally crashed some Filipino/Hawaiian family party, danced, sang.........then swam with 4 huge turtles. Oh - and I kissed some Fiji/Hawaiian guy at the beach. That night I went to another house party.........the band played me a goodbye song.......and I came home at the crack of dawn.
I fuckin' love it over there. So what if I didn't hook up with Jon. Things weren't meant to be. He's too conservative for me............besides he looks like the type of person who would complain about my personality. And if he can't accept me for who I am - then fuck him. He's still my good friend but I realized that I totally love being by myself. I mean - Look what happened.........I had Sex on the Beach!
The Big Island is where I definitely had the most fun. I don't think it was the prettiest island but the locals there rock! We arrived there on Thursday and that night Jon and I went to a bar. Thank God he went back to the hotel early because a few hours after that - I got laid. I got so drunk that I had to pee. I ended up peeing in the ocean (don't Ewwww me - it's not like YOU have never done that before!) Anyways.......so I PEED in the ocean and then had Sex on the Beach. It was so much fun. The next day Jon and I went sight-seeing......blah blah blah. Later that night I chilled with the locals by myself. I got totally shit-faced and went to some house party. My last day there I totally crashed some Filipino/Hawaiian family party, danced, sang.........then swam with 4 huge turtles. Oh - and I kissed some Fiji/Hawaiian guy at the beach. That night I went to another house party.........the band played me a goodbye song.......and I came home at the crack of dawn.
I fuckin' love it over there. So what if I didn't hook up with Jon. Things weren't meant to be. He's too conservative for me............besides he looks like the type of person who would complain about my personality. And if he can't accept me for who I am - then fuck him. He's still my good friend but I realized that I totally love being by myself. I mean - Look what happened.........I had Sex on the Beach!
posted by Heidi at 1:11 PM
3 Comments:
Did you get sand in your muff? I hear it can be quite unpleasant....
No.........I didn't get sand in my nani......but I did manage to turn someone's jellyfish into a nice long eel.
Hahaha! Good for you. :)
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