Resuscitation "Trannie"

I'm driving in my car coming back from school
Laughing by myself like a stupid fool
Reflecting on last weekend in that CPR class
Still can't believe they certified my ass
Laughing fits in every room like a crazy lady
Giving mouth to mouth to a plastic alien baby
Trying to stay serious while yelling at a dummy
Thinking to myself, "Yo...this is fuckin' funny"
We had to pretend this kid swallowed a toy
Then teacher picks ME to give Heimlich to this boy
My friend starts laughing while I'm in front of the room
So hard to stay focused saving Dummy from his doom
Time was dragging and I was going mad
Last of the instructors was this cutie named Brad
Laying on his table was Resuscitation Annie
But to our surprise it was Resuscitation "Trannie"
That's when I lost it and got into one of my fits
This crazy looking thing was a man who had tits
He had an amputated leg and a deformed looking mouth
This poor thing looked like it wanted to shout
His face was so distressed with a crazy looking eye
I think it was best just to let this thing die
When Brad gave CPR the trannie's head fell to the floor
I laughed so hard I nearly walked out the door
Towards the end of the day I finally passed the test
Out of all my health care courses CPR was the best
It's amusing to know I can give mouth to mouth
So I'm warning the world that they better watch out.



"Having been dropped on my head as a baby, I believe it helps."

- Robin Williams